Growing Pains

Motherhood is hard. I don't know if I was naive or just didn't pay attention growing up, but I never knew the struggle involved in raising children. When I was pregnant with Hannah I had visions of a cute, happy baby always playing, eating all her food, sleeping well, etc... Oh brother, what was I thinking!? Don't get me wrong, Hannah is such a blessing but it's not all rainbows and flowers. Sometimes it is and other times it's messy floors and tantrums.

We've had a couple of rough days this week and I was in tears when Jeremy came home last night. I just felt defeated. At 19 months, she has taken on a mind of her own. She doesn't like to eat meat, she gives us kisses but then promptly wipes away our "cooties", and she has just discovered hitting. She is usually an angel but I think the combination of bad behavior has really gotten to me. All of this leads me to be less patient and irritable right back to her which in turn makes me feel worse. I am the adult, I need to be setting the example to her and teaching her to be patient and loving, even to people who don't deserve it.

This morning during our family bible study time, Jeremy reminded me that Jesus paid for our sins. Not just the sins in our past but the ones we currently commit and the ones yet to come. He chose us before the foundation of the world and He knew of the great sinners we would be but He chose us anyways.

"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." - 1 John 1:9

"It is crucial as a mom to ask God for moment by moment wisdom" - Lysa  TerKeurst

I am so happy to be a mother. When the tantrum ends, and she gives me one of her sweet smiles, I know it's all worth it. This is my calling, hard as it may be, and I need to rely on God to help me raise this little rug rat. And in those times when I fail, to rely on Him to pick me back up because this mama can't do this alone!