We serve an amazing God and boy do I feel so blessed right now. I've recently dived into the book "The 66 Love Letters" by Dr. Larry Crabb and it is changing every way I've ever thought about God before (in a good way of course). Jesus is slowly growing me and teaching me more and more about Himself. At times it is a painful process because I am seeing ugly things about myself. But it is also glorious because I get to see His goodness.
"For we ourselves also were sometimes foolish, disobedient, deceived, serving divers lusts and pleasures, living in malice and envy, hateful, and hating one another." -Titus 3:3
The main lesson I've learned in the book is pretty basic stuff that anyone who reads the bible can see; we are all fallen people with a sin nature. The only thing is, sometimes I think we forget that. We live our lives like we aren't 'that bad' and then go ahead judging other people in their lives. I'm not saying we can't distinguish between good and bad behavior, but I think it is a heck of a lot easier to see the sin in others than it is in ourselves. But the truth is, we are all desperately wicked and in need of His mercy and grace.
"How oft did they provoke him in the wilderness, and grieve him in the desert!" -Psalms 78:40
Because of this renewed understanding, I read the bible differently now. For example, have you ever read your bible and come across a story or two that really surprised you? Like when Jonah threw a temper tantrum with God, or even when Peter denied Christ 3 times, or when David had Uriah killed in order to get his wife. These are all stories we've heard before but to be able to really examine them has taught me that God's prophets, apostles and even a man after His own heart are not perfect. Although they helped His kingdom in numerous ways, they still desperately needed His grace and salvation. And so do I. I am in need of a Savior. There is no way around it. From the beginning of time, man has lived a life in rebellion of God, and that doesn't stop at me. My desire is for Him to increase in me and for me to decrease. This isn't about me, it's ALL about Him and I need to try and remember that everyday! Praise be to God for His mercy, His love, His grace and His patience with me as I learn to be the woman He wants me to be!